Saturday, July 30, 2011


So I was thinking about the term bougie. I did a couple searches on the net to see what others had to say. I was inspired to develop my own list to tell if you are bougie. By the way, the items listed on here are my intellectual property and are not to be reproduced without the expressed written consent of blog owner.

You might be bougie if

1. People always make reference to your bouginess. Everybody ain't wrong. Accept it. If you are always justifying or explaining why you're not, chances are you are only further confirming the assertion. After all, being bougie is something that others are supposed to know and recognize about you, but that should never be spoken of. Bougie people like to feign modesty.

2. Every time you go to a restaurant you think of something to let the people around you know that you are up on what's happening. For example, you request shelled eggs at IHOP because you don't want the powdered version. Or you request a cup of hot water in which to soak your silverware to kill germs.

3. You would absolutely never consider parking your vehicle any where that offers valet. As a matter of fact, you probably choose to go to clubs/lounges/restaurants/malls that offer valet over the others. You probably disguise this by letting everyone know that you prefer the crowd/bartender/menu/stores at this particular location when the truth is your bougie azz just wants to valet. Especially if you are parking any of the flagship vehicles of the black bourgeoisie (benz, bmw, lexus)

4. Speaking of might be bougie if every time you rent a vehicle you scoff when the Hertz representative offers you a Camry and ask, "Do you have anything European?"

5. Even if you don't shop at the bougie stores (stop acting like you don't know which ones...Whole Foods, Trader Joe's, stuff like that) you only purchase fresh vegetables and have a healthy disdain for anything processed or that has been loaded with preservatives.

6. You can't remember the last time you actually physically washed your own car. Or your idea of cleaning is calling Merry Maids.

7. You have something that you don't eat any more or you boycott certain stores because of your political awareness.

8. You use your passport for identification. Like your license isn't good enough.

9. You wouldn't consider driving anywhere that will take longer than 3 hours in a car. You fly so frequently that you have it down to a science exactly what time you need to arrive to still make the flight.

10. You own at least 3 articles of clothing that have been purchased from a vintage clothing shop. One of the hallmarks of being bougie is longing for the simpler times--relishing the classics of the days gone by.

So...that's my first attempt at a list of something like this. Maybe I'll try another topic soon.

Take care.

Sunday, July 10, 2011

Timeliness is Next to Respectfulness

I think a person's word is their bond. I'm a lil old school so I expect you to do what you say you are going to do. In the event that you cannot do what you say you are going to do, then there should be a way to communicate that such that I do not feel that you are not trustworthy. One thing is for certain, if you don't do what you say you are going to do, then I am going to begin to distrust you. The way that I process things are pretty simple. Yes or no. Today or tomorrow. I am or I am not.

I dislike when people are late. I strive to be on time. In the event that I am not going to make it at the agreed upon time (an infrequent occurrence) then I will extend to you a courtesy call to let you know what's going on and I'll be sure to include an updated ETA. To me, when you are late to something that you have agreed to attend at a predetermined time, then you are showing a lack of respect for the person or entity to whom you have committed. Some would argue that it's not that serious. I vehemently disagree. I cannot piecemill the areas with which I trust a person. I have to trust you implicitly or not trust you at all. I do not have room for a lot of gray areas.

Quick story. A few friends and I decided to go to King's Dominion last month. I told everyone to be at my place before 11 am so that we could leave. I call two of my people to see where they were. The response is, "I'm bout to leave my house in about 5 minutes." When people tell me things that do not make any sense to me I'm often left in a stunned silence as I try to make sense of what I've just heard. I'm thinking come again. How can you be about to leave your house in five minutes when the time is already 10:57? Your answer should have been something along the lines of, "I'm turning into your complex right now" or "I'm parking outside. I'll be up in 30 seconds." I told Ty (who was bringing Mike) to hurry up.

Fast forward to 11:30 am and still not Ty and Mike. I mean, who does that? Tonya and I left and headed on to the park. I sent a text to let them know that I had to roll out. I an apologetic text, a text saying have fun and then a phone call. I couldn't speak to Ty at the time because I was talking to someone about logistics for the park, but I did accept the call and say that we'd speak later. I guess I took too long to get back to him...(did anyone miss the part when I said I'm on the way to King's Dominion? Like I'm riding rides and stuff....I don't really have time to discuss your lack of respect or your tardiness)...I get an angry text asserting that I only left to impress Tonya and blah blah blah. Well, nothing could be further from the truth and the angry text isn't the subject of this post, neither is the assertion contained therein because people who know me well know how strongly I feel about people being prompt and timely. I mean, do what you say you are going to do. I manage to make it to places on time. It's not like I get helicoptered in. I plan ahead. Traffic? Leave 15 minutes earlier. You have to start from the time you are supposed to arrive at a place and plan backwards taking into account all of the tasks you must complete in order to arrive.

So here's the question. Do you agree that being late to an event that you have agreed to be on time to can be equated to a lack or respect?

Mind you I sent him a text around 9 am that morning and he assured me that he would be on time.

About the title...remember the saying that cleanliness is next to Godliness? Well, I'm throwing my own spin in the mix.