Random Thoughts

1. I started a new routine since beginning work again. I go to exercise each morning at 5:30 for about an hour, then come home get dressed and go to work. So far so good, but this morning the enemy tried to make me lie in the bed and not go. Get thee behind me Satan!

2. My boss asked me the other day when I was going to call a leadership team meeting. Mind you has not yet talked to me about being leadership chairperson. She sent a message through someone else asking me if I'd be interested. After some debate in my mind I agreed to do it. I had to think about it because last year I told her that I'd be interested in doing it. She gave it to someone else. That person is now in another role and can't do it. I guess that's why she decided to ask me if I'd be interested. On one hand I was offended because I felt like she should have given it to me when I inquired about it. Maybe she didn't feel that I was ready at the time to handle the responsibility. What convinced me to say yes is that it will look good on my resume. Anyway, so she has yet to step to me to officially let me know that I am leadership chairperson. Then all of a sudden I'm asked when I'm going to call a meeting as if to imply that I'm slackin' on my pimpin'. Naw, we ain't havin' that. I told her let's sit down so that we can discuss expectations.

3. How do you strike that balance between not seeming pressed but at the same time indicating your interest? There's this girl (well, woman--we're all grown up now) in whom I'm interested. (I almost said "...girl who I'm interested in", but my obsessive compulsive grammar disorder (OCGD) wouldn't let me, which is weird because I will use colloquialisms like wanna, gonna, etc.)We used to talk back in college. She lives in the ATL. I live in NC. I wanna spark things back up, but I can't tell exactly where her head is. The last time I saw her (about 3 weeks ago) we just kinda talked and whatnot at her spot, but I couldn't talk talk with her because one of her absolutely annoying homegirls was at the spot. This homegirl said a couple of times, "I need to take my azz home," and things of that nature, but next thing I know she done grabbed a blanket and got comfortable on the couch. I was thinking to myself, "Please, please take yo azz home. I got business to handle." Ole girl was like a tree planted by the river--I shall not be moved. Yeah, but I gotta let her know that I'm interested, but at the same time I don’t want to seem like I've been pinning away after her for a couple of years, because that's not the case. Like the old saying goes, you don't know what you have until it's gone.

4. I get so pissed off when my windshield wipers don't work. For whatever reason they work at their own leisure. The crazy thing is I recently had the 60,000 mile service done to the car (okay, it was like three months ago) but still they should have caught that/fixed that issue. When I take it back in I will definitely make sure that they are aware of the problem.

5. Hardly being a tv watcher, I feel so out of the loop about the current gossip and happenings in the world. If I don't find out on the courttv website or something like that I just won't know.

6. I have one friend who calls me daily. I need a good way to say to her that I enjoy conversing with her, but I cannot be productive/get any rest if I'm on the phone for 2 hours at a time. Again, I really do enjoy our conversations, but I don't wish to be tied up for that length of time. Who has 2 hour conversations anymore? Since my grandmother died, that's a thing of the past.

7. Perception is reality for most people. Do people see you differently from how you see yourself? Case in point: A curriculum facilitator (former teacher, now she tells other people how great a teacher she was when she was in the classroom) at my school gave a presentation and when it was over pulled me to the side and asked me my opinion about how she did. I thought she did fine. I asked why she asked me of all the 30 individuals in the room. Her response was because I'm so critical. I really don't know a time when this woman has had opportunity to interact with me and make this assessment. Further I disagree with the assertion. Perhaps I should have requested proof in Whitney Houston-esque fashion ("Show me the receipts!") to substantiate her, in my humble opinion, unfounded claim.

Preachers Gone Wild

I guess it's time for me to weigh in on what has happened. In case you live in the back woods, renowned prophetess* Juanita Bynum was assaulted by her estranged husband. According to the reports that I have read she and her husband were having dinner at a restaurant near Hartsfield Jackson in Atlanta. (Well really it's in College Park, but you know what we're saying.) Somewhere along the way they had a discussion that apparently got kinda heated and outside the restaurant/hotel (not clear on which one) her husband, Bishop Thomas Weeks III (yes I put the whole government out there) hit choked, and stomped on her. The alleged assault continued until a bellman pulled him off her. Just a little more background. They got married in 2002 in a very lavish televised ceremony. He was already a bishop and she was already in heavy rotation in all the church markets (TBN/with Bishop Jakes/hosting her own empowerment conferences, one of her most famous ones is "No More Sheets").

Apparently a while back Weeks told his congregation that there was trouble in paradise and Juanita would be having a less active role in the ministry. Basically if she came to church she would be holding down a pew instead of preaching.

Several things come to mind about this situation. Is he jealous of her success? I would argue that she is leaps and bounds more popular than he is. I have heard a rumor that the reason that they were separated in the first place is that Juanita questioned some of the close relationships he has with some of the male members of the congregation. Did she call him a faggot and is that when he beat the sh*t out of her? Also, to stomp on someone is indicative of the passion with which you despise them.

At first he didn't turn himself in to the authorities. Now he has turned himself in, been released on bond and --get this-- has entered a NOT GUILTY plea. WTF? So let me get this straight, you jumped on her in a parking lot, and ole dude had to pull you off her and you want us to waste time and energy on a fuggin' not guilty plea? This negro better not use a self defense argument, lest I drive to Duluth and smack him myself.

I'm getting ready to make a confession. As I am a full participant of this capitalistic society I have already developed a plan to take this unfortunate set of circumstances and turn it into a huge money maker. You know how gullible and pliable church people are. I'm certain that my idea can work. I was even reading some stuff online where people were saying let's just pray for him and whatnot. They didn't feel like he needed to go to jail. He just needs prayer. Why can't we pray for him while he's in jail?

One thing that is significant for me is how people already have so much ought against preachers. For him to do this only reinforces some of the negative views that some people harbor. I can hear someone saying, "I might not go to church, but at least I don't beat my wife." On some levels they would be justified. How do you step to this person to convince them that church can make a difference for them? What people, particularly, those who wear the cloth have to be sensitive to is that they are being watched. If he causes droves of people to leave the church/terminate their active relationships with God, then their blood will be on his hands.

*prophetess: She's supposed to be able have information/potential events revealed to her by divine providence. She couldn't foresee that azz whoopin'?

Just One of them Days

I had one of them days today. I had to get some stuff straight for my job. I left home around 9 o'clock and pretty much ran around all day trying to get everything handled. I hate to say it but when you have to interface with black institutions, processes just don't seem to go smoothly. (This is your captain speaking....we are about to experience a run-on sentence. Please buckle your safety belts.) It's almost as if each office doesn't know exactly what the next office does and since they don't know and they might not even know what their office is supposed to do, everybody just shoos you from place to place with the hope that someone who actually knows what needs to be done will find you and guide you to the correct path.

Right now I have a slight headache. I don't know if it's the chaotic state that I found everything in today as I tried to handle my business, the heat or a combination of the two.

All day Saturday I hung with a friend of mine who I've talked about before--I don't remember the fake name I used so I'll just use her real name (Tonya). Tonya, a couple of her cousins and I went to this thing for Tonya's job. It's was one of those back-to-school-unite-the community-we'll-give-you-free-haircuts/supplies-if you-come-and-don't-show-out sort of things. Before we could leave Paul locked his keys in the car and they had to open it with a wire hanger. In the new world order with AAA, I was shocked that anyone still has wire hangers in the trunk in 2007. Am I just being bougie? (sp) Once they got in the car we came to my spot to pick up some stuff for the night and headed to Tonya's mom's house. That's the usual meeting spot for drinks/cards/dancing/cuttin' up. I actually didn't want to hang too long and I was ready to go around midnight. I didn't drive and Tonya didn't feel like taking me home so I just took her car so that I could crash. I was invited to stay but there would have been like 10 of us trying to stay in one three bedroom house. Not feeling that at all so I went on home. We had a decent time though. I can say that this is the first time we had one of those sessions and I left with the same amount of clothes that I arrived with. Typically I get into stripper mode and start entertaining the ladies....(Tonya, her cousin Dot, Tonya's mom and whomever else happens to be there for the show).

I was kinda reluctant to leave the ATL. I really like it there. I can't wait to move. The hotel I stayed in was fly and I had such a good time. The realism is that I spent way too much money and I have very little tangible stuff to show for it, but as one of my coworkers said, I have my memories. All except for V-8 that is.

V-8

I'm typically not always this forward but sometimes some things just need to be said. I had the worst sex that I've ever had last night. It was sooo bad. One of my idiosyncrasies is that I'm not really touchy feely, but in the bedroom I expect lots of touchy feely/affectionate bordering on dirty talk, petting panting etc. Well it didn't go down like that. I had not seen this girl in like months and months but I didn't really expect things to go any differently. She was almost lifeless and completely emotionless. I almost asked her why she even let me come through. I got up from the bed WITHOUT getting a nut and got in my car and drove back to my hotel.

Quick education: The difference between men and women is that when women have sex they may have an orgasm. However, when a man has sex he is guaranteed to have an orgasm. Let me restate-I walked away without getting my rocks off and drove home. I'm not going to bore you with any of the dialogue between she and I (I was bored and I was there) but I remember the ride home last night as extremely funny.

It was so bad that I almost don't want to have sex anymore until I get married. I'm not exaggerating. It was that bad! If you've seen Waiting to Exhale there's a scene when this dude is with Lela Rochan and he's pumping away and she's looking so uninvolved/blowed because ole dude thought he was beatin' it up. The director lets us hear her thoughts as he's pumping and grinding and whatnot and she thinks, "I coulda had a V-8." So that's my new nickname for her--V-8.

In other news I took some me time to relax. I'm in the ATL, which is where I plan to move next year. It's been quite enjoyable up until this point with the exception of V-8. I have never been more repulsed.

Prior to this I spent two weeks in the 'boro attending a workshop where I was subtly and not so subtly insulted. The purpose of the workshop as I understood it was to provide strategies to help increase test scores. What they actually did was treat us (about 70 math teachers at failing schools) like we didn't have degrees in math. The first day the dude "taught" us how to solve equations! That offended my sensibilities, but because they were giving us $4000 for it I was able to take it just like I planned to take them duckets!

Also my mother's husband got his other leg cut off the other day. I don't know if I mentioned on here about the right one getting cut off, but if I didn't just know that now they are both gone. You have to be careful how you treat people or bad things will happen to you.

The realism is that one of the biggest lies ever told is that sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt. For my biblical scholars we know that life and death are in the power of the tongue. If you can speak life or doom to a situation, how then can you not all the more say things that are a minimum hurtful? I mean life/death vs. hurting someone's feelings. I don't think that there is any comparison. I know this is kinda random but I needed to say that.