Thursday, January 31, 2008


So I usually leave work around 2:15 each day, even though we're technically not scheduled to get off until 3:55. The school I work at is on a block schedule, so I teach three classes and have fourth block planning which starts at 2:09. I don't sign out or check out with anyone because I figure there's so many people who work here and so much junk going on that no one has time to keep up with little ole me. I get home on the sofa in my draws and a t-shirt ( I start stripping at the door) chillin' eating me some pork fried rice and chicken wings and my cell phone rings. It's someone from the school, but you know it's the main number, so there's no way for me to tell who it is. I answer and it's one of the assistant principals who is my primary evaluator. Let's call him Mr. G. The conversation goes something like this:

JayBee: Hello
Mr. G.: Hey JayBee, I need to meet with you.
JayBee: Um..okay..can it wait til tomorrow?
Mr. G: Naw, we need to do it today.
JayBee: What's it about?
Mr. G: We can't talk about it over the phone. We need to discuss it face to face.
JayBee: give me about 15 minutes and I'll come over there.
(In my mind I'm like crap because I'll have to get dressed and drive back to work to see what the freak he wants.)
We go back and forth a little bit more. I've forgotten now exactly what he said to make me say this:

JayBee: Mr. G., stop playing games. You know I'm not on campus.
Mr. G.: I know you're not. Didn't I tell yo black azz not to be leaving without anyone knowing?
JayBee thinks to himself,"I don't remember him saying it, but whatever" I don't respond.
The conversation fizzled. He really didn't need to meet with me, but he and another teacher decided to "get me" by calling me knowing I wasn't at work. Luckily for me he like me and he wasn't being serious. The realism is though, we too m effin old to be playing games. If you want something from me, just say so.

The thing that I don't like about asking people who are in authority to do stuff is that there is the chance they could say no. Me being me, if it's something that I've already decided that I'm going to do, I'm going to do it anyway. If I do it and you've already said no then you'll think I'm being insubordinate. That's why I'd rather ask for forgiveness than ask for permission. Umma do me (Rocko) and if it's a problem later on, I'll just be like my bad--I didn't know--I'll do better or some similar half-azzed excuse.

Friday, January 18, 2008

I Get It Now

The title of the previous post was actually a little premature. Now I can say that I am officially in recovery. After I took the entire prescription, the rash got worse. I don't know if my body rejected it or if I'm allergic to prednisone or what, but it got worse rather than better. Since then I ordered some stuff online that is supposed to eradicate the condition. I noticed today that most of the ones of my arms, face, and some of the ones on my stomach are beginning to dry up. Maybe a couple more weeks and I'll be back to normal. At least I'm hoping it won't be much longer than that. I can't help but wonder if God is communicating something to me through this. You know how they say everything happens for a reason? Well maybe He needed to slow me down so that I would reassess some things in my life. I will hasten to say that it has worked. I get it. I need to do better in my personal, professional and spiritual lives. I've vowed to do some things differently. For one, I'm really going to work on forgiving that man my mother claims is my father. In addition, I'm taking a step back when it comes to offering (unsolicited) advice to friends/colleagues. Only at someone's behest will I put my mouth on their situation/issue. This is particularly challenging for me because when someone comes to me with a problem (or something that I perceive to be a problem) I instinctively go into fix it mode. This little bump in the road (no pun intended) has forced me to pray much more and seek God more closely. I've known for quite some time that my spiritual life was grossly off kilter, but I was complacent in what I was doing--half going to church, not praying or reading the Bible, not consulting Him for guidance and direction. I know better and this has made me remember my roots because for the issue I'm experiencing, there really is not another being on whom I can rely save and except for Him. I get it now. I'm listening.

Listening to Sam Cooke's "A Change Is Gonna Come"

Saturday, January 5, 2008

In Recovery

My niece noticed two red bumps on my forearm during my visit home for Christmas. I hadn't noticed them myself, but I did think them odd. Over the next maybe 8-9 days more of them appeared. It was at this point that I became concerned because I didn't know what they were or from whence they came. (Check that Bible-esque language.) I left work early yesterday to go see the doctor. The bumps did itch, but just ever so slightly and not all the time. They are on my chest, arms, legs and stomach. I waited in the doctor's office for what seemed just short of an eternity, because before the doctor was to see me he got an emergency call and had to step out. He took a quick look at the bumps, reared back in his chair and listened to me answer the questions that he asked and finally gave me a diagnosis. He said they were mulluska something or 'nother. He told me they can come from children or adults--anyone whose skin with whom you have come in contact. He gave me a two prescriptions. The first one is prednisone which had a laundry list of side effects, but is supposed to be very effective. The other thing he gave me is Zyterc, an antihistamine and to quell the itching. I'm hoping by next Friday, at least the bumps will be all dried up/gone away. I'll keep you (all one of you) informed. In other health-related news, I tried a colon hydrotherapy treatment today. The initial sharp pain of the tube insertion subsided within seconds and let's just say the flood gates began to open. The realism is that the initial insertion was so momentarily uncomfortable that as reflex I grabbed the lady because I was out of sorts. It's all good though. I left with my dignity and manhood intact.