1. Why is it that when you tell somebody something they have a tendency to discredit what you have said? When someone of a different race (white or Asian) or in a higher position tells them the exact same thing, then it's suddenly the gospel truth.
2. Have you ever lived with someone whom you felt like you were rearing? (Southern people say 'raising', but you raise sugar cane and sheep. You actually 'rear' people).
3. I wish a police officer would pull me over for anything. Now that I'm back on the right side of the legitness (is that a word) as far as my license is concerned, I will be in a position to verbally thrash any officer who pulls me over for no good reason at all. I'm getting badge numbers, superior officers, tag numbers, etc., and am definitely going to accuse them of pulling me for driving while black.
4. Why did one of my students take another student's paper, erase his name and replace it with his own name? The thing is, the student who erased the other person's name didn't even erase it good. How foolish can you be?
5. For some strange reason when I go out looking for things to wear, I usually return uncharacteristically empty handed. Things just don't seem to suit me anymore. Pardon the pun.
6. When you forgive someone, but find it hard to forget the infraction that initially caused you the pain, do you believe that is indicative of unforgiveness? I don't. I think you'd be a fool to try to forget what cause the problem in the first place. By remembering, you are able to guard your emotions against such damage in the future. Any thoughts?
7. I can cook a mean turkey leg.
8. It's been a while since we last spoke. Maybe I'll make the first move.
9. If you make a simple request of someone and they constantly defy the request, is that a sign of their disdain for you, their need to assert their own authority or a combination of the two?
Tuesday, February 27, 2007
Tuesday, February 20, 2007
Sometimes when I tell people this they look at me with that look that says, "I know you believe what you are saying, but it just doesn't sound plausible to me." The realism is I have a mild case of esp. You know, extra sensory perception. Sometimes I get these feelings that I can't shake. Sometimes I have a dream that at a later time in life will unfold itself. One can argue that it's that feeling that most everyone has experienced at some time or another known as deja vu. I cannot tell you how many times I've dreamed about some seemingly insignificant event and then later had the event take place. A lot of times I was even clothed the same way as in the dream. Other dreams sometimes unfold in a slightly modified form. I mean, the major theme of the dream will take place, but some of the minor details may be different. For example, about seven years prior to my grandmother's funeral I dreamed how the ceremony would be. For the naysayers, we all know that death is certain. I am not suggesting I dreamed that she was going to die. That would not be a revelation. What I am suggesting, though, is that there is no way I could have known the color of the casket, what she would have on and where it might take place. (The where part is arguable, because it took place in the church that she had been a member of for quite a while. However, she used to attend another church.) Still not convinced? One time in high school I dreamed about an illicit affair. Truthfully, in high school, since most people are not living in matrimony, aren't all of our trysts illicit? I digress. I dreamed about this girl with whom I would perform a specific sex act. Whadayou know? It happened. Even as it was about to happen I remembered the dream. I wanted to stop it. I felt powerless to do so. It was almost as if I had read the script, but had not the ability to alter my lines or yell 'cut'. Even as I ponder that event now, I wonder why I couldn't make it turn out differently. Was that even (sinful event) predestined? Or was I just feeling fresh (what we use for 'horny'; see entry entitled, "The Burgeoning" for reference to vernacular)?
It isn't just me either. My sister has the same ability. Quick story. We had a great uncle who was mentally ill. (Strong record of mental illness on his* side.) Anywho, he walked off from his home one night and no one could find him. After he was missing for several days, my sister had a dream. She then told my aunts/uncles where Clarence was. She told them he was naked and in the woods dead. We're from a small country town that was at the time heavily wooded. This information was relayed to the authorities. They went searching for him. Just as she had said, he was found dead in the woods naked. It was some on point that I jokingly asked, "Are you sure you didn't do it?"
Hear me clearly. I am not saying that I have a crystal ball and can tell the future. It just so happens that sometimes I get a feeling about things or sometimes I dream a dream that comes true. The question is, after I dream the dream, I wonder if unconsciously I try to make the events in the dream become a part of my reality or if they were going to happen anyway.
*See post entitled, "The Burgeoning" for further clarification
Saturday, February 17, 2007
I'm lounging around my apartment finding divers things to busy my mind with in a song and dance that I've done so many times before. This is how I act when I participate in the abominable act with my mistress. She is a quite culpable; she presents a detour for me on countless ocassions. She is the very reason I don't get as much sleep as I should. Each time she visits, I spend the hours dining and sexing her. After I reach for my washcloth, I then have to complete whatever task she has used her wiles to keep me from starting and as a consequence, keep me from bringing to fruition. So starts the lost time in respite because I have to make up for the time she has stealthily stolen from me. One day I'm not going to let her get the best of me. As a matter of fact I need to tell Ms. Procrastination it's over. We're done. The realism is, though, I just can't find the time.
Friday, February 16, 2007
The realism is, it is.
Wednesday, February 14, 2007
An acquaintance of mine--let's call her Kim*--claimed she got into an altercation with her stepfather. I don't remember what it was about, but suffice it to say that their relationship wasn't particularly cordial or pleasant and so the two of them arguing was a normal occurrence. Well, this particular day the argument transitioned from a verbal one to a physical one. (I can hear Ludacris in the background, "Throw dem bows!") Some kind of way in the tussle, the stepfather ended up at the foot of the stairs and she was left on the landing at the top of the stairs. Her explanation was that she(5'2" 170 lbs) overpowered her stepfather (6'3" 280 lbs) and threw him down the stairs. I know, I know, that's a lie too, but stay with me. The best is yet to come. Anyway, in her fairytale world, after she tossed that giant down the stairs,---hold up. Let me give just a little more background on Kim. She claims to be a black belt in karate. I told her she may own a black belt but that I doubted the former claim. Of course she insisted she was telling the truth, but what else would I expect from a pathological liar?
Back to the story. So once he was downstairs and she was still upstairs on the clearing, she became so furious that she reached in her bag and began to throw ninja stars at him. Seriously as I was typing that line, I chuckled. It doesn't matter how many times I retell this story, I am in disbelief each time. Are you ready for the question? Question: Where in the thundering tarnation did she get ninja stars from? Did she really believe that I believed that she 1) had ninja stars and 2) that I believed she knew how to use them if she had them and 3) that she actually used them? I don't know but a dangerous weapon like ninja stars might be illegal to carry.
So you ask, why would I talk to a person like this who obviously tells ridiculous lies? The answer is simple. I like to laugh.
Monday, February 12, 2007
Saturday, February 10, 2007
- Breyer's cookies and creme.
- Brown-skinned to dark skinned girls (not a color complex, just a preference)
- People who will stand for what's right or say what needs to be said, even when it's unpopular.
- Learning other people's vernacular. Think back to college or some time when you were around people from all over the US and other countries. The way other people express ideas intrigues me. For example, where I'm from to indicate the degree to which you are interested in doing something we say "pressed". Used in a sentence: "Yo, that dude was pressed to get her numba." This dude I knew from Jersey always said 'beat'. Think same sentence except replace pressed with beat.
- Justified text. This is one of my numerous idiosyncrasies. I simply hate ragged text. If you're not sure what I'm talking about look in any book (or look up at this entry) and see how the text is even on the left and the right. If you use left align, the text is ragged on the right hand side.
- Phony people.
- People who are always late and the lame azz excuses they always have.
- When you go out to eat there's always someone making a stink about some minuscule detail that made their meal/time just unbearable. If it's so bad, just push it to the side, don't eat it, don't leave a good tip and don't return.
- People who leave crappy tips. My best friend is a server. I know how much junk they take off people all day. Quick story: This lady left my best friend a $1.00 tip after Kiki had to keep running back and forth to her table for all her whims. Once Kiki discovered the dollar, she raced outside to the parking lot looking for the woman. When she found her in her car she knocked on the window and told her she dropped a dollar. The lady was like, "Oh no, sweetheart, I left that for you." My best friend tells her that she can have it because obviously she (the lady) needs it more than her.
- People who knock other people without knowing their story. How you gonna sum up someone else's existence, when you don't even know them?