Saturday, July 30, 2011

बौगिए

So I was thinking about the term bougie. I did a couple searches on the net to see what others had to say. I was inspired to develop my own list to tell if you are bougie. By the way, the items listed on here are my intellectual property and are not to be reproduced without the expressed written consent of blog owner.

You might be bougie if

1. People always make reference to your bouginess. Everybody ain't wrong. Accept it. If you are always justifying or explaining why you're not, chances are you are only further confirming the assertion. After all, being bougie is something that others are supposed to know and recognize about you, but that should never be spoken of. Bougie people like to feign modesty.

2. Every time you go to a restaurant you think of something to let the people around you know that you are up on what's happening. For example, you request shelled eggs at IHOP because you don't want the powdered version. Or you request a cup of hot water in which to soak your silverware to kill germs.

3. You would absolutely never consider parking your vehicle any where that offers valet. As a matter of fact, you probably choose to go to clubs/lounges/restaurants/malls that offer valet over the others. You probably disguise this by letting everyone know that you prefer the crowd/bartender/menu/stores at this particular location when the truth is your bougie azz just wants to valet. Especially if you are parking any of the flagship vehicles of the black bourgeoisie (benz, bmw, lexus)

4. Speaking of cars....you might be bougie if every time you rent a vehicle you scoff when the Hertz representative offers you a Camry and ask, "Do you have anything European?"

5. Even if you don't shop at the bougie stores (stop acting like you don't know which ones...Whole Foods, Trader Joe's, stuff like that) you only purchase fresh vegetables and have a healthy disdain for anything processed or that has been loaded with preservatives.

6. You can't remember the last time you actually physically washed your own car. Or your idea of cleaning is calling Merry Maids.

7. You have something that you don't eat any more or you boycott certain stores because of your political awareness.

8. You use your passport for identification. Like your license isn't good enough.

9. You wouldn't consider driving anywhere that will take longer than 3 hours in a car. You fly so frequently that you have it down to a science exactly what time you need to arrive to still make the flight.

10. You own at least 3 articles of clothing that have been purchased from a vintage clothing shop. One of the hallmarks of being bougie is longing for the simpler times--relishing the classics of the days gone by.

So...that's my first attempt at a list of something like this. Maybe I'll try another topic soon.

Take care.

2 comments:

Ieisha said...

Guilty of #6 (except for the Merry Maids part, lol) and #7.

Physically washing my car has no appeal. I like the car wash and tipping the guys who do a great job.

And I totally boycott Wal-Mart. For a plethora of reasons, some political. They're anti-union, fight unemployment claims, don't have a healthy work/life balance for their employees, etc. I call Wal-mart the Taliban.

P.S. Your blog title is in Arabic again.

JayBee said...

@ieisha: i had walmart in mind when i wrote that. i totally think i might need to go to another site because i don't know what the heck i'm doing that makes the title turn to arabic. thanks for continuing to stop by.