Wheh!

I made it back last night and like I said in the previous post I was too tired to write. I just got out of a meeting a school and now I can share.

Day 1 - I left work and went home to get my bags. I decided to carpool with a female colleague. She drove. Mistake #1. She was late getting to my house to get me. We had to drive about an hour to the airport because the tickets were $140 cheaper to fly out of Raleigh as opposed to Greensboro. I like to save money when I can. If the tickets had only be $50-60 cheaper, then I would have paid the extra $$ to fly from Greensboro. Anywho, like I said she was late getting me. Once we got on the highway I was nervously watching the speedometer noticing that she was hovering around 60 miles per hour. In a fit of desperation I finally blurted out that we were not going to make it to the airport in time to catch the flight (foreshadowing - remember that from ninth grade English?) if we kept up this pace. She sped to about 70. I was thinking wow you're really going fast now. It was at this point that she shared with me that there was something wrong with her transmission and she couldn't go very fast. I'm thinking the transmission. That's major. If you had said that before we left, I would have gladly driven. Please understand that I don't like to ride with people because I trust myself and my automobile more than other people's stuff because I maintain my vehicle. No shade tree mechanics. I take my ride to the dealership.

When we made it to the airport we went to the self check in kiosks and we couldn't check in without assistance. I knew what that meant. We were too late. Of course that's the message that the people behind the desk communicated to us. The flight we were scheduled to be on was the last flight leaving out that day on Northwest. We checked other airports and other hubs to see if we could fly to another hub and catch a connection to Dallas. No such luck. They wouldn't put us on another airline either. The best they could do is offer us the first flight the next day. Meanwhile I had a hotel reservation in Dallas for Thursday night because the conference was starting early Friday morning. Before I finally accepted that I wasn't going to Dallas on Thursday without coming out my pocket to just buy another ticket I pulled out all the stops. Usually I can convince people to be sympathetic to my plight--especially if the person is a woman. If I do say so myself, I can be very charming and persuasive. Imagine my surprise when exhausting every ploy and tool in my bag of tricks she still had not agreed to put me on another airline so that I could get to Dallas Thursday night. She gave us the "distress passenger" coupon for a nearby hotel so we just crashed in Raleigh waiting on the flight for the next day. We got something to eat. My colleague was so apologetic; she didn't want me to talk shit about her. She was like please don't be mad at me. I told her if I were mad you would know. I'm not usually really good at hiding my emotions--a flaw that I sometime manipulate to be advantageous for me.

Both of us were hungry so we caught the hotel shuttle to get a bite. On the ride the dude was taking us on all these back roads with no streetlights. I'm thinking to myself and then I asked her--let's call her Michelle--why are there no streetlights? What is he doing? My mind started thinking about how he could be taking us to a secluded area to slaughter us or something terrible like that. It was at the point that I decided if I didn't soon see some civilization that I was going to open the door and jump out. I was not comfortable because I just had an erie feeling. And the dude wasn't talking to us. I mean, he could have been tired or whatnot, but there's nothing wrong with being pleasant and making small talk if to do nothing more but put people at ease. Eventually we made it back home and crashed.

Day 2 - We woke up around 5 a.m. to be at the airport by 6:15 because our flight was scheduled to depart at 7:10 a.m. I checked my bag and had a carry on. I thought they had relaxed the liquid rules at the airport but apparently I was mistaken. They told me I could go back downstairs and check my carry on if I didn't want them to throw away all my stuff. I tried to do that but it was too late to check any more bags by the time I got down there so I ended up having to go back through security and still got all my stuff thrown away. The flight was uneventful. We had a connection in Memphis so I got to try the infamous Corky's since they had a little place in the airport. I had a pulled pork barbecue sandwich that was decent. When we finally landed in Dallas we caught the train to the hotel. There's a tunnel that leads from the train station to the hotel. Absolutely ingenious and so ultra convenient. If you clicked the link you see the tall structure with the ball up top? I'll pause while you look if you didn't already. Okay, now that you have the visual, I wanted to go in there but it was closed for renovations. It's one of those revolving restaurant deals where you can get a panoramic view of the skyline. I chose the hotel in part because of this. I feel like they need to make an announcement on the hotel web page to say that the tower is closed so that people will at least be aware and possibly make another choice of hotel.

When I got to the hotel I was waiting in the line for Gold Passport members. The front desk clerk made the asinine move mistake of taking the next customer in line before calling me. I wasn't having it. I let her know that I wasn't confused about where I was standing and that I am in fact a GPM and would like to be treated as such. She apologized profusely and got me straight with my room. I appreciated that. You should have seen the indignant looks on the Caucasian people's faces who I was taken in front of. For a night at a hotel you can use MasterCard. For the look on their faces when I was shown preferential treatment--priceless.

Before I checked in we jumped right into the conference sessions. The stuff that people were presenting was so substandard. I was encouraged because I know that I can do a presentation if that's all that is required. Of course I wouldn't be half azz when I do a presentation because it has my name on it, but for what I saw it appears that anyone who signed up to present was afforded the opportunity.

That night we went to a club called Purgatory. I didn't know the name of the club until we had been inside for probably an hour. I ordered a long island from the bar but didn't like it. I don't waste liquor because it's expensive in the club, but I threw it away. Had a good time. Kinda felt like college days. I stumbled home good and sweaty around 4:40 a.m. Of course we had sessions on Saturday morning beginning at 8:15 a.m. When I got back to the hotel Michelle had already left the club and was asleep. We shared a room, but not a bed. I slept on the roll away and let her have the bed, even though I'm the GPM among us.

So I'm actually leaving out a part of the story. I started not to write this part, but I may as well be truthful. I left the club about 2:00 with this girl I met inside. We walked to another club in the area but left after a few minutes. We were both feeling fresh and feeling each other. Yeah so you see where this is going. When it was over I called a cab from her spot and that's when I stumbled in the room at 4:40 a.m. subsequent to me getting my rocks off. By the way, ole girl has an oral ability that should be studied. I would rank her in my top three seriously.

This is turning into a lot....I'll do days three through five tomorrow.